Phoenix: Rising
by Nicky2
Summary: The culmination of the Phoenix series, in which Obi-Wan must deal with the aftermath of Anakin's murderous actions...and face the guilt he himself holds inside.


Title: Phoenix: Rising  
Author: Tyger  
Author E-mail: amidalakenobi@hotmail.com  
Rating: PG for mild swearing.  
  
Disclaimer: Nothing of this belongs to me, and I'm receiving no money for it, okay? If writing this stuff paid off, I'd be living in the French Riviera right now, and I would have no need to keep boring you with my writing.   
  
  
Rising  
By Tyger  
  
...There's hope in the darkness  
You know you're gonna make it...  
-Savage Garden, Two Beds and a Coffee Machine  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The speeder slid silently to a stop in front of the shipyard. Its lone occupant got out slowly and headed for a ship near the back.  
  
*The Queen's starship.* The thought of Ami sent shivers up his spine. He'd never see her again, and neither of her children would ever know their mother.  
  
He understood that he couldn't keep them with him. He knew that one of the children could go to Alderaan -- one, but not both. After a long mental debate, he figured that Leia would be the one to go there; why, he wasn't sure, but it just seemed *right.*  
  
But there were two children, not just one, and if he suddenly showed up on Coruscant with a two-month-old baby, people would start asking questions.  
  
On the other hand, if a couple living out on a moisture farm decided to adopt the same little boy, it would draw much less attention.  
  
He strode up the ramp quickly, the speed was merely a cover for his trepidation. The ship was dim and all but deserted. Off to his left came the thin wail of a child: Luke. He turned in the direction of the cry.  
  
Sabè was holding the wailing infant in her arms, holding back her own tears as she rocked him. She didn't even notice Obi-Wan as he entered.  
  
"Sabè," he said softly.  
  
She gasped and turned around, one hand digging for her hidden blaster.  
  
"Take it easy, it's just me," he placated her. The blaster didn't waver. He tried again. "Sabè, it's me: Obi-Wan."  
  
She looked dumbly up at him for an instant, then slowly lowered the weapon. "Obi-Wan? Skies, you look awful." So much for tact. But it was the truth, he did look terrible...and so much older.  
  
"Listen to me. I want you to take Leia to Alderaan. Bail Organa has promised Amidala he'd care for her if something happened."  
  
"What about Luke?" she inquired tremulously.  
  
"I'm taking him with me."  
  
"Obi-Wan, please! Amidala's dead, I have to give Leia away, and *you're* leaving, too! How can you take Luke away? He's all we have left."  
  
"Amidala asked."  
  
Sabè froze in mid-protest. She had respected the queen's wishes for twelve years now; she could not ignore this last request. She bit her lip and wordlessly handed the bawling child over. Obi-Wan lightly touched Luke's forehead, and the baby subsided reluctantly into a restless sleep. He looked wordlessly at Sabè, whose face was now damp with tears.  
  
"Will you care for him yourself?"  
  
He shook his head. "I can not give him the protection he needs...But I know someone who can."  
  
She nodded. "Will you come back?"  
  
"I can't."  
  
She seemed to accept this pronouncement without questions. "May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan."  
  
He nodded emotionlessly. Wrapping the infant up against the cool evening, he left the ship for the last time.  
  
~~  
  
Owen and Beru Lars lived about twenty kilometers outside of Mos Eisley, on a tiny moisture farm surrounded by nothing but desert. Obi-Wan never could understand what his half-brother saw in this desolate place, but Owen and his wife were happy here.  
  
Whether he would be as happy when Obi-Wan showed up was a different matter.  
  
He stopped the speeder a short distance off and walked the rest of the way. He needed to think about how he was going to tell Owen this, as the two rarely kept in touch. His brother knew he was a Jedi Master, but that had been a source of constant animosity when they were growing up: Owen, like his father, had no Force powers.  
  
Obi-Wan knocked on the door without hesitation. He had to do this, and the more he thought about it, the harder it would be.  
  
By Tatooine time standards, it wasn't quite as late as on Coruscant, so the two were still awake. Apparently, local visitors usually came in the form of armed trouble -- Owen came to the door with a blaster in his hand.  
  
And he didn't lower it upon seeing his brother. One might have thought he didn't even recognize him.  
  
"What do you want, old man?"  
  
"Old man? Owen, it's me."  
  
"Who are you and how in the hells do you know my name?"  
  
Beru appeared in the doorway. "Owen, who is it?"  
  
"Stay back. It's just another vagabond looking for a free night's rest." He eyed Obi-Wan suspiciously. "If you stay here, you have to work to earn your keep."  
  
Then Beru, who had completely ignored her husband's warning, shouldered forward.  
  
Obi-Wan turned desperately to her. "Beru, it's me. It's Obi-Wan. Doesn't anyone know me anymore?"  
  
She studied him for a moment, then shook her head, looking concerned but no longer fearful. "You can't be...but you are, aren't you?"  
  
Too relieved to speak, he only nodded.  
  
"What happened? Your hair..."  
  
"What about it?"  
  
"It's - it's turned white."  
  
He raked his free hand through it and sighed bitterly. "I suppose it's a side effect of losing two close friends within a day of each other."  
  
She gasped. "Anakin?"  
  
He nodded slowly, his face devoid of all emotion. "And Amidala."  
  
Her eyes widened in sympathy. "Skies, I'm sorry. Come on in, Obi-Wan. We weren't expecting any guests, but we can make room."  
  
"I can't stay."  
  
"Then what do you need?"  
  
He indicated the sleeping baby in his arms. "Amidala's children have no one to care for them. Please understand: I can't do this. Leia will be all right on Alderaan, but I need someone to care for Luke."  
  
Owen interrupted. "I'm sorry, Obi-Wan. We can't afford another mouth to feed, and you know that."  
  
He felt the hopelessness rise within him. He looked at Beru, pleading. "I know you've always wanted a child. Luke won't be safe if he goes back to Naboo. Palpa- Someone is looking for him. He will be hidden here."  
  
She turned to her husband. "We can't just turn him away, Owen. You know we can't."  
  
"Where will we get the money?"  
  
Obi-Wan realized he had to appeal to his brother's more miserly traits. "If I could promise you a thousand a month, would you be able to take care of him?" He winced inwardly: this sounded far too much like slave trading. He knew that Amidala had left him as the heir of her estate if something happened to Anakin, therefore he had more than enough money to pay.  
  
Owen's eyes narrowed shrewdly. Obi-Wan knew he was calculating the total over ten years, fifteen... "For how long?"  
  
"I don't know," he admitted.  
  
Owen's gaze traveled between his brother and his wife, both of whom were looking hopefully at him. He threw up his arms in defeat. "You win. We'll take the boy in. But I'd better get that money, Obi-Wan, or back to Naboo he goes."  
  
"You'll get it, Owen, I promise." Weak with relief and fatigue, he handed the sleeping infant to Beru. Upon the transition, Luke opened his eyes and cooed softly.  
  
"He looks just like Anakin," she murmured, smiling. She looked up, afraid this thoughtless comment might have adverse effects on Obi-Wan. But he only appeared tired, his eyes and heart deadened from the strain of the past days.  
  
"You'll make up some kind of story, won't you? Not just for the neighbors, but for Luke as well -- that you're relatives of some kind. He can keep his own last name; there is no one left alive who shares it."   
  
(Amidala, Shmi, Anakin...Luke was indeed the last one to carry that name. Leia's last name would be changed soon, probably to Organa. No one would even consider that the Tatooine farm boy and the Alderaanian princess would have anything to do with each other. It was perfect.)  
  
Beru glanced up at him. "Are you all right? You can stay here for awhile if you need to."  
  
He shook his head. "No. Thank you, Beru, but I still have...business elsewhere. Perhaps I'll return someday. To keep an eye on Luke until he's ready to know."  
  
*Know what?* she wanted to ask, but kept silent. Something in his voice had left no room for questions.  
  
Impulsively, she turned to Owen. "See if you can find anything we can use for a crib," she ordered.  
  
She turned back to the Jedi. "Don't even think about it. I know what you want to do, and I can't let you do it."  
  
"What are you-"  
  
"You *know* what I'm saying: you think that if no one depends on you, you can walk out that door and over a cliff and be done with it all. And I'm telling you that you can't do it. It doesn't work that way."  
  
"You don't understand what it's like, Beru! I killed my own apprentice...  
and he killed the only woman I've ever loved. I have nothing left to live for."  
  
"Oh, yes, you do," she whispered fiercely. "You have Luke. I don't need to be a Jedi to know that he'll take after his father in more than looks. He has the talent to be a great Jedi, Obi-Wan. It is he you must live for."  
  
He paused for a long moment, then nodded. "Thank you, Beru. It means a lot to know that someone else believes there was a reason for this - this..." Words failed him, and she could see a tear glinting in the corner of his eye. "Take good care of him, Beru. I know that Ami...she would have trusted you, as I do now."  
  
Without seeming to move at all, he was gone, back into the blowing sands from whence he had come.  
  
~~  
  
The desert was calm in the morning suns. The night breezes had effaced all signs of Obi-Wan's visit. They seemed to have taken the man himself with them, and perhaps they had.  
  
There was no indication that he ever been there, no suggestion that the night's events had been anything more than a strange and vivid dream. Waking, Beru was suddenly wondered if it had happened at all, that perhaps the whole matter had been a figment of her imagination.  
  
Then, from across the room, came the soft murmur of a baby.  
  
  
  
~The Beginning~  



End file.
